Lessons from 10 years of homeschooling
Dear Ones,
For years I wondered if I was doing a good job of homeschooling. When you are an outlier, creating as you go, it can be disconcerting to try to get a read on where you are, where you are headed, and how it’s going. All I knew is that I wanted my kids to be kind, creative, and skilled at learning so they could keep learning their whole lives long.
At the Wild + Free conference I attended last weekend I had the chance to finally feel done - I’d done it. We’d homeschooled. And we’d done it well. Whew.
These were the three ideas that seemed relevant to all of us, homeschooled or not:
1/ Learn, move, live at your own unique pace. And, this will change month by month, project by project, day by day. When we tune in and really provide a full choice for ourselves about our pace we are in a totally different dimension. There are times when full throttle is perfect and I am bringing in the groceries on two wheels while licking the stamps for the post and updating my website. Then there are other days when I am reading three things at once, basking in being off the clock, marinating in the ideas that surface to thrill and to guide me. If I were to reverse them I’d be pulling unripe ideas out of the ground like angry carrots and wandering the grocery aisles hoping for inspiration to strike. Realize that there are multiple paces on any give day and be sure your are dialed into your choice and let it last as long as it need to support you.
2/ Go deep on what feels important to you. Lean in. Yes, buy the books! Sign up for the course, even if you only show up for one of the live sessions and watch two of the replays. Maybe that’s all you needed. Trust your interests. Book the tickets. Get the magnifying glass and spend hours on details no one else would appreciate. Revel in your own curiosity. I believe our wonder is our compass, charting lives no one else could guess or understand.
Each of us has a particular role to play - yogis call it dharma. It’s why you’re here. And your interests are how you are prepared for your dharma. And it is going on our entire lives. Comparative Literature was not a big vocational preparation except for book editing. My love of movement and yoga seemed like a hobby and personal therapy. A graduate degree in experiential curriculum design couldn’t find a home. Over 1,000 hours in philosophy and yoga courses and retreats seemed like overkill. But it all fit together into a life I love so fully and truly that I could never want another. I believe we are all being prepared to live our dharma. Keep leaning into the quirks and the questions and the things you really really really love to do. It’s adding up.
3/ Read. Read with friends, read outdoors, keep a book in your bag always - for times of just in case. Yes, be discerning and notice the pile of unread books. But here’s where I’m at… I have unread books too. In the past they haunted me. But I am learning that books have deep duration - they have holding power. Sometimes, the times we buy them are not the times to read them. Now, with the kids out, with a clearer path ahead of my own, I am digging into books that have been sleeping since their purchase and I am so glad they are right here for me right now.
Plus, reading uses and trains our brains in ways nothing else does. Reading daily is a mental restructuring that repairs the quick and fractured nature of online life. Every topic has a book. Or reach back into something you got but never opened. Try it out. Let me know how it goes.
I’ll never stop homeschooling. It’s just learning outside of the box. It’s what I do all day. It’s what I teach and how I teach it. New classes and events on the schedule.
And if you feel called, join me for an immersion of learning at Tribe in Baltimore.
Ownership is the first installment of three courses to convey what I’ve learned from 30 years of practice. When we take ownership we take hold of our lives and our circumstances, look them in the eye, and decide how we would proceed. There are so many reasons not to. There are so many ways we have been rewarded for doing what we are expected to. But that leads to burnout, resentment, despair, and disease. The longer we live, the longer the wrong choices can accumulate in us. There is time to turn to a new page and to build the strength to be fully in our choices. Take Ownership.
October 4, 5, 6 and 11, 12, 13
Fridays 6-9pm, Saturday 12-3pm, Sundays 12-3pm
Register at Tribe. $350 both weekends or $175 for one (yup, you can come for just one)
Come join in. I’ll meet you there.
All love, Martha